He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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