ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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