I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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