sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize