dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
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