I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
