i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize