i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
