I think i peed on brittanys purse
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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