We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize