is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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