Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
