So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
