when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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