i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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