I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
