Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize
