I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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