he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
