If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
