Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
