Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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