I am puke
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
This baby is an asshole
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
