I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize