Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
