Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
