What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
You were trust falling into bushes
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
