Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
