watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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