Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
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