I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
The struggles of a small town man whore
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
