Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
she pinky promised me she was 18
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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