my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
bring money and cleavage
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize
