Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Randomize
