grandma shit on top of the toilet
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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