5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
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Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
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I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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