I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
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