anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Dick very happy bro
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize