I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize