One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
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