We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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