He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I have demons in me.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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