...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
