i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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