Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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