Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
