Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
