Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
