im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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