I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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