Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
